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2:10 We’ll be talking about how to negotiate. Much of the material we’ll be talking about is covered in Dr Marty’s book: Negotiation for Couples, from Conflict to Connection.
3:38 Conflict is a part of every relationship. It’s not about the differences, it’s about how you handle them!
4:20 How to get through arguments with your partner without emotional collateral damage.
6:00 What is a way to approach different points of view, so both partners can feel good about the outcome and the process of a negotiation?
6:20 Take your partner’s feelings and perspective into account. How can we have a win-win situation?
8:20 The first principle of effective negotiation. Effective negotiation is not about winning. It is about both people feeling good about the outcome.
9:02 One way to sabotage negotiation is to put down the other person’s ideas.
9:30 A good communication opens up discussion.
9:50 We listen to Rich and Mary, negotiating about Mary’s idea to move closer to her mother.
10:20 Dr. Marty takes a call from Diane. When it is a good idea to negotiate an issue? Should I talk about it at the time, or should I wait?
14:25 Negotiation needs to take place at a time and place when you are both calm.
14:35 The “Oreo technique”.
22:45 Approaching your partner with a calm and positive attitude makes all the difference.
23:30 We return to Rich and Mary. Does Rich show respect to Mary’s feelings when he approaches the question with her?
26:00 What can Mary do in response – to open up discussion – without generating conflict?
27:00 Next week we will talk about the different types of negotiators, and the best ways to have negotiation happen.