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3:10 This show will continue our discussion of “Dr. Marty’s 13 Rules for Good Communication.” If time allows, we will get into “four essential things for a good relationship”.
3:26 How can you make sure you follow through on your New Year’s resolutions?
3:44 First, a quick course on motivational psychology, and the Carrot & Stick School of Motivation.
7:18 We return to our Rules for Good Communication, and review what we covered last time: 1. Looking at the person who you are talking with. 2. Using “I” instead of “you”.
8:11 Rule 3. Listen to the emotion behind your parter’s words.
8:56 Rule 4. Pay attention to how you sound, and how you come across – with tone, and volume.
9:50 Rule 5: Focus on what your partner is saying, rather than thinking of a rebuttal. Understand, before you ask to be understood.
12:26 Rule 6: Be more focused on the feelings of the other person. Be curious about what is important to them. Learn about them, rather than rebutting them, or making your own important point.
13:58 Rule 7: When having a discussion, focus on the things that are essential.
15:05 Rule 8: Watch the other person. And listen.
18:30 Rule 9: The most powerful part of communication is the emotions involved. Be mindful of your partner’s emotions while you are communicating and listening, and relate to those emotions.
22:00 Rule 10: When you are talking, talk in a simple and straightforward way, and not lecturing. Is your partner understanding what you are trying to say? How does reinforcement and feedback work in these situations?
24:45 One basic concept: In every level of communication, there is somebody who is a sender, and there is somebody who is a receiver. Who has more power over the communication, the sender or the receiver?