Our show is available for listening here on YMC. Be sure to tune in every Tuesday at 7pm, on 107.9 WOLD, for our next show. Post your questions right here on the blog. And we look forward to hearing from you on the show!
The call in number for the on air program is 732-748-1079. You can also post questions right here, to be answered on the show.
1:39 Review (from previous show) of how we can identify anxiety on two levels: noticing physiological response, and noticing self-talk.
2:00 Review (from previous show) of two-step strategy on dealing with anxiety.
6:05 Dr. Marty takes a call from Tommy. Tommy’s friend has visited Dr. Marty’s practice with wonderful results helping his marriage. Tommy feels he has similar issues, but after 29 years of marriage, he feels that whatever he does, it isn’t right. He doesn’t feel appreciated.
7:35 Tommy talks about how it seems like the more he does, the less he is appreciated. And it feels like he’s being taken for granted.
8:20 Dr Marty asks, “If you could ask your wife, how appreciated does she feel, what would be her answer to that?” Tommy believes that his wife might feel the same way he does.
8:45 Dr. Marty describes “Love Languages” – the different ways people feel love. He suggests Tommy ask his wife if she feels appreciated, and then to really listen to what the answer is, so he can learn more about his wife’s Love Languages.
9:15 Tommy and Dr. Marty talk at length about different, new ways of seeing this situation.
14:45 Tommy and Dr. Marty conclude their call.
15:35 Finishing up our series of five programs on negotiation.
16:20 We talk about the third and last stage of negotiation, which is connection. Just getting agreement is not enough. We want to make sure that the agreement does not come with strings attached.
16:50 Reviewing the strategy of “Offer and ask”. Dr. Marty uses the example of Robert and Judy to illustrate this strategy.
18:23 We review the concept of “Benefit of the doubt”.
19:40 Where did our tendency to reflexively become negative and defensive come from? How can we change this?
20:40 Another strategy: Don’t be afraid to take a break in the middle of a discussion.
21:30 Dr. Marty talks extensively about what can be done to get things back on track when a negotiation has gone off the rails.
24:00 We talk in detail about “The strategy of last resort”.
26:27 Details on the purpose of the Connection stage.