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1:15 What do you call a negotiation that’s gone wrong? You call it a war.
2:45 Recap of the importance of emotions in a negotiation, especially: staying calm, understanding, and being fair.
3:05 Recap of the first step of negotiation: the preparation stage. Knowing where you want to go in the negotiation, and what you want to end up with. What do you want to avoid?
3:25 We had started to talk about the heart of the negotiation process: the commitment stage.
4:15 We will talk more about the commitment and connection stage in this show.
5:40 What are the very most important things to keep in mind during the entire negotiation?
7:20 We really dig in to some specific techniques in Dr. Marty’s “Second Stage” of negotiation – the commitment stage.
7:25 Two important guidelines that will help you get commitment from your partner: 1) Realize that there is more than one way to see things. 2) Respect the other person’s value system.
7:50 We overhear a conversation between John and Mary. They have a break from the kids, who are away with friends on a Saturday morning, and John makes an overture for sex. Mary has other ideas on what she wants to do with their free time. What happens next?
11:15 New scene! Do-over time for the above conversation. We hear what happens this time.
12:55 As a rule successful negotiation needs to be more understanding of the other person, before there is agreement, let alone compromise.
13:45 We talk about the next two guidelines. 1) Focus on what your partner is saying, rather than your own response. 2) Ask “Why?” – “Why is this important to you?” Find out the details.
15:50 Another guideline: How do you relate to the other person, so they can really hear you?
16:30 How do the different dynamics of emotions and sexual intimacy, between men and women, affect the specifics of sexuality, and negotiation?
17:40 We talk about fairness, and how to establish a sense of fairness in a negotiation.
18:20 Some great specifics on what NOT to say when you are negotiating. We visit with John and Mary again.
20:45 The heart of it – You have to evaluate your own performance.
21:15 Closing with a series of constructive things that you can do with negotiation.